Being someone's little sister

One of the best parts of having a long-lost sister is learning what it's like to have a big sister. I called mine last night, in some frustration over my job search.

She was sad that she couldn't get her Skype to work because she couldn't see me.

I told her I looked like crap. She told me that she wanted to see me anyways.

Long-lost sisters are the best. Everyone should have one. ;-)

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My long-lost sister

This story was a long time in the making. When I first found out that I had a half-sister, in 2009, I didn't have all of the pieces of the story. There are probably still pieces yet to be revealed, and there is a huge chunk that can never be known because our father has passed away, taking his point of view with him. But on the fifth anniversary of discovering her, our "sisterversary", I thought I would share what I have. Many people have heard the story in person, but there are many more from school and previous jobs that have never heard it. And heck, it is a story with a very happy ending. :-)

My sister, Mary-Anne, is on the left and I am on the right. This was taken at our first meeting.

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Grief and heavy appliances

I bought an air conditioner today because of an OMG heat wave and I thought it would be good for my allergies. There was nothing on the box that said it had to be installed in a window and I have never bought an air conditioner before. I hauled it home, hauled it upstairs, unpacked it, and then I discovered that it had to be installed in a window. It has to vent the hot air outside.

In some ways, I was reminded of what happened the day before the first anniversary of my father's death. A little early for Throwback Thursday, this is what I wrote on July 28, 2007:

I came home to a London's Drug flyer. Advertising countertop dishwashers. I have wanted one for a while. So I thought to myself that I would get one. Even though I'm planning on buying a condo, hopefully one with a built-in, or room for a built-in. I wanted a dishwasher.

I got up this morning and sprayed Raid on some ants on my living room carpet. Then I used the SpotBot to clean up. I played LOTRO (Lord of the Rings Online). I went to Wal-Mart first for comparison shopping. They don't have any.

It was hot. The whole day has been hot. The whole week has has been hot.

My inner voice questioned whether I really wanted to do this. Was this a way of not thinking about July 28, 2006? The day my father was removed from life support? The day I thought he would die, not knowing it would take him 18 hours to die?

I went to London Drugs and picked out the dishwasher. First I had to go to the camera section to get someone to come out with a cart to get it. Then we went to the cashier.

My Mastercard, the one with a $3,000 increase in my credit limit, popped up "Call for authorization". The cashier was flummoxed. She called someone. The someone said to ask me if I have another card, because otherwise I'll probably have to call Mastercard and it will take about 10 minutes. I do not have another card - well, a Sears card, but London Drugs does not take those.

My inner voice asked if I really wanted to buy a dishwasher. I have no clean spoons. I wanted a dishwasher.

The cashier called Mastercard - first she had to find their merchant number. Then she didn't know the actual physical address of the store that she works in. While she was waiting for the stock clerk to find it, I pointed out that it is printed on a sticker on her phone.

Mastercard said I had to call. They pointed me to a phone - which does not permit long-distance calls, not even 1-800 numbers. I used my cell phone.

I've been using my card more than usual. Well duh. You gave me an increase in my credit limit. Yes, the charge yesterday at Michael's was a purchase that I made. And the online fee to LOTRO. And iTunes purchases ($1!) We went through my last ten purchases. And then my purchase was approved. I do appreciate that Mastercard wanted to make sure my card wasn't stolen or compromised. I do.

The dishwasher wouldn't fit in my trunk. The stock clerk went and got someone to help her load it into the back seat.

It was very very hot by then. I drove home, struggled with the box up the five stairs to the apartment building door (and Lightly Swarthy Guy held the door. Didn't offer to help with the heavy box. Pig). I struggled to get into my apartment. I cleaned off a counter, struggled to get the dishwasher out of the box and onto the counter. I dug out the instructions and doodads.

The stupid thing doesn't work with my faucet. I dismantled the spray nozzle to see if it would fit. No.

The sweat was pouring off my face as I tried to Make It Work. My inner voice said I should have a cool drink and go play some LOTRO. So I did.

I did and I didn't want to go see my father as he lay dying. I was very squicked out at the thought of seeing him. But there was an amends I had forgotten to make the night before, when I thought I was seeing him for the last time. So I went. And I gave him my amends. I don't know if he heard. He was on morphine. And his body was fighting for life. His body was making horrible sucking sounds. On July 28, 2006, I was supposed to be in Calgary. Registering for the Weekend to End Breast Cancer, an event I'd trained for and raised $2,000 for. I wasn't supposed to be standing in the ICU at the Dr Everett Chalmers Hospital in Fredericton. Watching my father's body struggle.

I decided to see if there was an attachment I could buy, to make the dishwasher work with the faucet. I took a picture of the faucet. I put the doohickey from the dishwasher in my purse. I went to Home Depot. The clerks told me I needed to buy a wrench and remove the bottom part of the faucet.

I rent. I had looked at that bottom part of the faucet, and it looks like someone glued it in there. I went and looked at the wrenches anyways. The cheapest is $39.

I realized then, that I was trying very hard to pound a square peg into a round hole. I started to tear up, so I got the heck out of Home Depot and went home. And had more cool liquids and played more LOTRO.

It's going to be a pain in the ass to put that dishwasher back in the box, take it to my car, and take it back to London Drugs, but it has to be done. Maybe I'll borrow Amy's boyfriend for that. Their house is a mess, so he can't say anything about the state of my place.

I was thinking of going to Johnston Canyon tomorrow. My inner voice says I can drive all over Alberta if I want, but I can't hide from the fact that tomorrow marks the first anniversary of my father's death. So I have no idea of what I'm really going to do.

Seven years later, I know better than to try to Make It Work. The windows in my bedroom are casement style and it would cost a lot to seal in the air conditioner. I don't feel it's worth the bother to install it in the office, a room that doesn't need an air conditioner. I'm returning it tomorrow morning when it will be cooler.

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Northern Lights at Elk Island

My plans for the weekend were:

Friday - drive to Edmonton, stay with my sister and her family

Saturday - spend the day in Edmonton, have Easter/birthday supper at my sister's house (date and time chosen because of three different guests having dogs on certain feeding schedules).

Sunday - spend most of the day in Edmonton because it was my sister's birthday, drive back to Calgary.

Monday - chill out.

I wanted to drive because I'm feeling adventurous these days and am tired of taking the bus. Also, there was the strong possibility of Northern Lights, and Elk Island National Park is by Edmonton. It's renowned among the Alberta Aurora Chasers group for being away from city lights. It's not perfectly free of light pollution, but an excellent spot.
I figured that if I did go chasing Friday or Saturday night, I could bring my nephew. He's up all night anyways, he could be my bodyguard. ;-)

My plans fell apart Friday with a snow squall that left the roads icy and slushy. I bought a bus ticket and decided that there must be a Reason that my plans changed.

The Reason was that the Northern Lights came Sunday night, when I was still in Edmonton and not in Calgary as planned. :-)

And it wasn't just my nephew with me. I asked my sister if I could borrow a car and she said, "I'm coming with you! It's my birthday!" Her husband drove us out to Elk Island, along with my niece, and my nephew's friend.

I took a lot of photos, even before the Lights showed up at midnight. At one point, I just pointed my camera at the sky. And accidentally got some meteors.


Here are my favourites:






There was a pesky cloud formation on the horizon, but I managed to shoot above it. We left after that show - people had work to go to and buses to catch in the morning. I'm a LOT happier with these photos than last week's.

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The Wonder Woman Garden Gnome

On my LiveJournal, I asked people to pick a day in December and topic for me to post about.

So far:

• Dec 10 - "What do you paint, and do you have favorite painters?"
• Dec 13 - "The role that music has played in your life."
• My choice of dates - "Canada"

Feel free to suggest more!

----

So. Painting. Well, the sad thing is that I don't paint much anymore. In another life, I painted Barbie dolls.

Most of my 2013 creativity has gone into rediscovering a love of knitting. The good thing is that my inner voice is screaming at me to produce more artwork. I picked up a pencil and started sketching over the weekend. Part of the reason I'm clearing out a corner of my basement is that I can have a creative space.

Background information - in 2009 I discovered that I have a half-sister, Mary-Anne. She is now one of my best friends.

But I did paint something in 2013. My sister once said that she'd like to have a garden gnome painted like Wonder Woman. I kept that filed away in the back of my mind. In 2013, Mary-Anne turned (a number I won't make public). We usually make our birthday presents for each other, and I knew that I needed to really go big this year.

So I loaded pictures of Wonder Woman on my iPad, went to a Colour Me Mine shop, and with the help of one of the extremely enthusiastic employees who LOVED the idea:

(Posing in my garden)

Her cuffs are painted silver to represent Wonder Woman's bracelets. The flowers are red and yellow as the best representation of the eagle on her leotard. (The only other female garden gnome in the shop was carrying a basket).

Naturally she needed red boots with a white stripe, just like Wonder Woman.

And her braids are tied with yellow. And she has a yellow belt, of course.

The skirt could have used a couple more coats of blue, but after four coats on two visits, I was done. The extremely enthusiastic employee added another coat (with my permission) and it still isn't perfect.

But that doesn't matter. Because when I put the gnome in a Wonder Woman shopping bag and handed it to Mary-Anne for her birthday, she knew from the weight what I had done. She knew that I'd remembered what she had once said, and I made that wish a reality. She loved it.

There's a new Colour Me Mine one neighbourhood over. I'm planning on certain Star Wars garden gnomes for my 2014 garden.

As for the second part of the question - I'm fond of Da Vinci, Van Gogh. I have a Matt Busch Lost poster that I really like. My late grandmother gave me a painting she'd done of one of my cats, and I treasure that.

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Remembrance Day

Remembrance Day, a photo by angelamermaid on Flickr.

Via Flickr:
A picture of a picture I found in my files. I was looking for pictures of my father in uniform and found this. I think this would be 1971 or 1972.

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Heat Wave

First it rained for 40 days and 40 nights. I didn't keep track, but it sure felt like it.

Then came the floods. Fear of the unknown. Would my basement flood? Did I stock the fridge with enough water? Am I on the same power grid as the evacuated parts of Deer Run? Do I have candles and a lighter in a central location? Would I have to evacuate? (No. Yes. No. Yes. No.)

I have never in my life seen so many emergency alerts on TV. None of them were a test.

There was the horror and sadness. I've seen floods on TV before. I've seen the annual floods in New Brunswick. But I have never seen Calgary flood like this. The train tracks for my daily commute buckled and the tunnels filled with water.

I am one of the lucky ones. I can stay in my home with my cats. We are safe.

Water restrictions went into place. Quick showers. Trying to use disposable plates and cups and cutlery to avoid using the dishwasher.

The uncertainty of working from home. Am I doing okay?

And then days without rain. I watered the garden with rainwater from those 40 days and 40 nights. I'm almost out.

Today the temperature rose to 36 degrees Celsius. (97 degrees Fahrenheit). Felt higher, with the humidity. It's been a long time since I've had to deal with such hot and humid conditions. I used the timer on my phone to remind me to drink a full glass of water every hour.

The cats were limp. I found Hermione huddled up against the cold air vent in the living room while Chloe slept upstairs and looked miserable. Charlie was subdued.

None of them seemed to want to go into the basement, Charlie and Hermione wanted to stay in my vicinity.

The mayor asked people to reduce their power usage ASAP as rolling blackouts had to be initiated.

So I grabbed some catnip, some cat beds, and some blankets. I went down into the basement and rubbed catnip on the bedding. Charlie and Hermione came down first. I tried to catch Chloe but she wouldn't let me. She came down on her own.

I turned on one light and started organizing the basement a little better. When the cats were looking perkier, I turned off the light and brought out the laser pointer. We had fun playing Red Dot of Doom.

I didn't do any gardening until 9:30, when it was cool enough to be bearable. I sprayed myself with Off and got to work. I'm going to lose some of the sweet peas to the heat and lack of rain.

Now we're under alert for a severe thunderstorm. High water alerts have been issued for places north of Calgary.

There have been good moments. My sister came to Calgary this weekend to be my guest at a coworker's wedding. I got to practise some reiki on Mary-Anne and she loved it. We had a great time at the wedding and reception. It was the first time I'd seen my coworkers since the flooding started.

The next day, I took her to the labyrinth in Silver Springs. I walked behind her. I noticed at one point she paused to look at a dark butterfly.

Afterwards, she hugged me and told me that she thinks the butterfly was our father, that he was happy to see the two of us together. She said that black butterflies are meant to represent souls of the dead. I thought it was pretty.

Now I'm tired and sweaty and covered in dirt and Off. Time for a quick shower before bed.  I want my normal back.

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The Country of Zirconic

Andrew, my sister's son, established a micronation in his man cave, in 2009. I helped him set up the Facebook page for it. He's done a great job working on it, dutifully holding elections twice a year. Somehow he always wins as Prime Minister. ;-)

As the Secretary of Foreign Affairs, I invite you to read the new micronational wikipedia entry on The Country of Zirconic.

I love these two items from the Constitution:

8. All citizens are allowed to be of any sexuality. They shall not be judged based on who they are attracted to.
9. All citizens are allowed to be of any religion. They shall not be judged based on their personal beliefs.

Have I mentioned he's 14?

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Of Visitors, Lemons, and Ladybugs

My sister and her family and an exchange student friend from Quebec came by today. Apparently five visitors is too much for the cats. The girls hid. Even Charlie wasn't sociable, although he did allow some quick pats.

They love the townhouse. BIL brought a bottle of sparkling apple cider, and we toasted the home. My nephew was thrilled to discover that I have goblets, and insisted on drinking cider from that. We sat out in the garden where it was warm and sunny.

oOoOo

I see a health food store from the C-Train every day. Today I made a point of going in, looking for some advice on managing my osteo-arthritis. I'm not in chronic pain but dang, I feel I should be managing it consistently now. My doctor hasn't been much help, all he wants is to see me lose weight (something I want too).

A very friendly clerk helped me pick out a supplement with glucosamine. She also spoke with me about my diet, and trying to reduce acidity. Basically, she recommended drinking lemon water, and removing sugar, dairy, and flour. "The fun stuff," I quipped.

I'm drinking lemon water right now. :-) I made do with lemon juice, I had so much to do today that going to a store for lemons was not in the cards.

oOoOo

After another trip to the Comic Expo, I went to the nearest garden centre. I got more pansies, it's my goal to have at least one survive. I also got some tomato starters and garlic chives.

Note - I have never liked raw tomatoes. I don't like the texture or the smell. I'll eat them in sauces with no problem. I used to pick them out of salads and would never have them in sandwiches, until I decided that the health benefits of them warranted me actually eating them. I can eat them with salads and sandwiches now.

So why did I buy a couple of tomato plants? Well, apparently they're easy to grow and damn it, I want some success in the garden. I have a hunch that the pride of growing tomatoes would make them less icky.

While I was transplanting the new plants, a ladybug crawled over my back steps. Yay!

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I like to take pictures

Cathedral Grove, Vancouver Island, British Columbia. August 2010.



My sister and I stopped here and walked around for a few hours. For the first time, I filled up 1.5 memory cards. Just drinking in the green.

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